Three years ago, the world was still alright. It seemed that nothing in the world could shake this order. Since then, everything has changed. Everything is upside down. I've lost contact with my beloved granddaughter! 

But let me start from the beginning: Katja, my dear granddaughter, was born in the spring of 2012. My son had already separated from his partner at the time, to whom he was not married. Shortly after Katja's birth, she abruptly left the house they had shared and took the child with her. In the time that followed, it became clear that the mother wanted to possess Katja and raise her without the father, as an amicable custody arrangement proved impossible, despite the involvement of the youth welfare office. 

Das erste Gerichtsverfahren vor dem Familiengericht bahnte sich also an, um eine Umgangsregelung festzulegen, die von der Mutter zunächst zähneknirschend, dann aber dennoch recht zuverlässig umgesetzt wurde. Zwei Jahre später, 2015, wurde gerichtlich um das Sorgerecht gestritten, denn die gemeinsame Sorge kam für die Mutter niemals in Frage. Das Oberlandesgericht bestätigte schließlich den Beschluss des Amtsgerichts, dass die elterliche Sorge nun gemeinsam ausgeübt wird. 
Mein Sohn kam oft mit seiner neuen Partnerin und Katja zu Besuch zu mir, wo ich alleine – mein Mann ist vor 8 Jahren gestorben – in einem Haus mit großem Grundstück lebe. Katja hat es geliebt, um das Haus herumzutollen, am nahen Bachlauf zu spielen oder mit mir im Garten zu arbeiten. Und mir hat es Spaß gemacht zuzuschauen, wie Katja sich über all diese neuen Eindrücke freut, die sie in der Stadtwohnung ihrer Mutter nicht hatte. 

The four of us also went on holiday together, and I shared a room with Katja. That was always the best thing for her. Whether we were in the Harz Mountains, the Black Forest, or the Allgäu region, I always loved Katja's lively company, and she never left my side. I was always sad when it came time to say goodbye. But I knew it wouldn't be for long. 

An einem Wochenende im April 2018 stand wieder ein Besuch meiner Enkelin an, denn mein Sohn war mit ihr in der Nähe auf einem Vater-Kind-Wochenende und die beiden wollten anschließend noch bei mir vorbeischauen, bevor Katja am Sonntagabend wieder zu ihrer Mutter zurückkehren sollte. 
Katja berichtete mir stolz von ihren Erlebnissen des Wochenendes gemeinsam mit ihrem Papa. Sie habe einen erloschenen Vulkan besucht und – wie früher die Höhlenmenschen – Feuer gemacht. 

Katja was tired but happy when the two of them finally left for home. It was to be the last time I had contact with Katja and could speak to her. It breaks my heart. 

Since Katja's return to her mother this past weekend, her mother, seemingly out of the blue, initially prevented any further contact with my son, until Katja herself vehemently refused any contact with her father and his entire paternal family, including me. The mediation efforts of the youth welfare office initially managed to overcome Katja's resistance, and she was able to visit her father again for two weekends in November. Everything was as it had been before. Katja was happy and content.

The mother then filed a criminal complaint against my son for assault against Katja. This finally proved successful, as visitation rights were initially suspended by the court, and a family psychological evaluation was commissioned. The evaluation concluded that Katja was experiencing a loyalty conflict, that she had an unhealthy, symbiotic relationship with her mother, and that, as a result, she had sacrificed her relationship with her father. The recommendation was that the parents receive counseling, and that Katja be supported by an independent, trusted person. Both counseling and support for Katja were successfully refused by Katja's mother, so that ultimately, due to the stagnation of the situation over the course of time, visitation between Katja and my son was suspended by the court for another 18 months.

This also meant that I wouldn't see Katja, my sweet, cheerful little granddaughter, for a long time. I was devastated. My son's long, grueling fight for his beloved daughter has made him ill. It pains me deeply to see all his efforts in vain and completely ignored by the judges and everyone else involved. He is suffering greatly—and I am suffering with him. 

A child needs both parents to be happy. Why doesn't anyone see that? I'm 80 years old now and I no longer have the strength to go to court to fight for visitation rights with Katja. I just desperately hope that my son will be able to see Katja again, that Katja won't forget her grandmother, and that the wounds will heal. I so wish Katja would romp around me again – like she used to.  

But I don't know if I'll live to see that..